You have two cows/11

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This article is part of the You have two cows series.

[edit] Category Eleven: Speak the Language...of Cows

Mistranslation: some own cows of two

1337: Y00 |-|@\/ 2 |<0\/\/Z 101Z

AAAAAAAAA!: AAAAA AAA AAAAA AA A AAAAAAA AA AAAA AAA AAAA.!

African clicky noises: Klickx! X!click !klikk! k'clack kl!ck.

Afrikaans: U het twee koeie.

Al Bhed: Oui ryja dfu lufc.

Amish: I have two cows, but you cannot see them because we don't have electricity.

Amish 2: Oh yes, I have two cows. They're out in the barn we built this morning. Would you like to see? Oh, and no photos or videos please.

AOL: u hav 2 cows??/

Arabic: لديك اثنين من الابقار.

American: You have two hamburgers. Those hamburgers probably originated from McDonald's or Burger King.

Armenian: Երկու կով ունիս

Attorney: It is stated in your affidavit that you have two cows. Is this correct?

Australian: Fuck the cows, chuck another steak on the barbie and get me a beer!

Aza Mazian: Youzay hazayve twozay cowzays.

Babelized: They appear at the moment with the 2 clean cows.

Baby Speak: Mama and Dada have two moo-moos.

sdrawkcaB: .swoc owt evah uoY

Bartixan: Yix Tix Cixz

Bengali: tor duita goru ase shallah!

Binary: 01001110 01001111 00100000 01000010 01001001 01001110 01000001 01010010 01011001 00100000 01000011 01001111 01010111 01010011 00100000 01000110 01001111 01010010 00100000 01011001 01001111 01010101 00101100 00100000 01000010 01001001 01010100 01000011 01001000

Boomhauer: Yup, I tell ya what man, you got those two cows goin' on there man, that's a lot o' milk there, me I just buy milk from the corner store man, they got a special, buy one quart get one free man.

Brazilian Portuguese: Você tem duas vacas. Uma é a sua mulher. A outra eu não sei, talvez seja você mesmo, só que sem os chifres.

Bulgarian: Имаш две родопски крави!

Bulgarian English: You are have two kravas! Да тъ еба, не разбираш... TWO... KRAVAS!

Canada: Yoo have two cows, eh? Well, how aboot that, eh?

Canada (2): You have two cows. Vous avez deux vaches.

Caveman: Hrroom! Hrrum! Hrrussh! Hrruup!

Chatspeak: u lyk hv 2 cws wtf brb lol

Chinese (Cantonese): 真係唔明喇，點解你有兩頭bull，但係冇半頭牛呀？

Chinese (Simplified): 哞～挣钱的同胞们的两头牛请交给中国共产党保管

Chinese (Traditional): 哞～你已經有兩頭牛！請繼續努力賺錢，吃吧！

Chinese (Literal): 你有两头牛。

Bill And Ted: You totally have two cows, dude! EXCELLENT!

Bill Clinton: You have two cows, depending on what the meaning of "you", "have", "two" and "cows" is.

Cherokee: 'tso u-ha 'ta-'li wa-ga (Ꮶ ᎤᎭ ᏔᎵ ᏩᎦ)

Coach Z: You haerve two CAAAOOOOOORRRRRRRWWWS!!

Cockney English: Blimey! You 'ave a couple a' Chairman Maos. Nuff said, yeah?

Comedian: Two cows walk into a bar...

Communist: Those two cows belong to everyone.

Cow: Moo.

Cow 2: Nobody asked me about any of this two cow business!

crazzzy: ääääääääg pölöpååååååppeli hüüt.

Crash Bandicoot Talk: Ahoo gagabadibbadababibble.

Croatian: Imaš dvije krave. Ali si u onome sistemu imao tri.

Cryptography: MQG B7JX EZQ HQZA

Cynicalese: You have two cows.....riiiiiiiight. This is a bunch of bullshit!

Czech: Máš dvě krávy.

Danish: Du har to køer

Danish (Translated): You have two cows.

Danish½: Du ejer ingen køer da Sverige og Tyskland har erklæret det som krigsbytte for alle de krige du har tabt.

Danish½ (Translated): You don't have any cows since Sweden and Germany have claimed it to pay off all those wars that you have lost.

Dirty Talk: Are those two cows in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?

Divehi (Maldives): ތިބޭޅާ އަތްޕުޅުގަ އޮތީ ދެގެރި އިނގޭތޯ؟

Dolphin (language): K'kkk squeeek squak'kkkk squee!

The 3 Dot Language: ...

Draconic: You had two cows....but then you got hungry and ate them.

Duck: Quack quack quack quack.

Dutch: Je hebt twee koeien, en ze zijn allebei stoned.

Dyslexic: Yuo heav tow cwos.

Early Modern English: Thou hast two kine.

Ebonics: Shiiiit, yo. Y'all be gettin' yo' two cows on like a muthafucka.

Egyptian hieroglyphs

         (__)
         (oo)
  /-------\/   | |
 / |     ||    | |
*  ||----||    | |
   ^^    ^^

Egyptian hieroglyphs 2

(>.<)_,,!,, U!

Elvish: Elda Haryanëryë yaxët ono ùmëa nauco macët. (An elf had two cows, but an evil dwarf killed them.)

Engrish: Two cow are berong to you.

Engrish (2): There is have two cows. You is operate many mirk of both to make.

Enron My two cows beacame four after I sold them to a subisdy in the Cayman Islands before multiplying them by two to ensure that, instead of 8 cows, I actually had 9 from the beginning, but sold those 11 cows so I would not have to report them in the Fiscal Report.

Esperanto: Vi havas du bovinojn. Unu parolas la ĉinan kaj unu parolas la litovan, sed ili ambaŭ povas paroli flue Esperanton.

Estonian: Sul on kaks lehma. Amuuu..

Ethiopian: Hah-boo-gee-snik-gowah-Kow! Gowah gowah eat!

Evil Overlord: Foolish man. You think you have the upper hand because you have two cows? That is what I wanted you to think. Even now, a microscopic bio-nanobot army tears through your cows blood system, rendering them milkless. If you want your cows to live you will have twenty nine minutes to relenquish the obsidian mind crystal to me or I will crush them like it is only too easy to do so.

Filipino (Tagalog): Ikaw ay may dalawang mga baka.

Finnish: ~~Sinulla on kaksi lehmää.~~ ~~Sulla on kaks lehemää.~~ Mutsillas oli kaks lehmää.

Finnish (translated): ~~You have two cows.~~ ~~U av 2 cowz.~~ Ur mom had 2 cowz.

Flemish: Awel, gij hebt twee koeien he, moar ons Bella, da's een kwaai zenne!

French: Vous avez deux vaches... mais elles sont en grêve depuis que l'on veut vendre leur oncle en steak haché avec des freedom fries dans un McDo.

French: Fetchez les deux vaches!!

Les quois?!

Gangsta: yo, ya matha ****ing loco cows are righta hierrrrraaaaaaaaa!!!((gunshot))

George Bush: I am the decider. I have decided your two cows will fight in Iraq.

German: Du hast zwei Kühe. Eine ist arbeitslos. Sieg Heil!

German before the Reunion: Du hast zwei Kühe. Zwischen beiden steht eine Mauer.

Greek: Έχετε δύο αγελάδες.

Groundhogese: Hehaa chitter ooat urp.

Gumby: MMM! MMMM! MMM MMMM!!

Hebrew: !אחי, יש'ך שתי פרות Achi, Yesh le'cha shtei parot!

Hindi: Aapke paas do gai hain. Aap unki puja karte hain. आपके पास दो गाई हैं । आप उनकी पूजा करते हैं ।

Hungarian: Két tehened van. Statisztikák készülnek róluk és kiderül, hogy átlagosan 5.4 lábuk van és 3 amper tejet csinálnak. A Magyar Köztársaság Kormánya köszöni, hogy ennek a tejnek 95.74%-ának árával politikusaink zsebét tömi.

Huttese: Gru i gren groag cogrs

Hyperbolic: Oh my fucking god, everyone has two-hundred cows!

Icelandic: Þú átt tvær kýr.

Icelandic (2): Til allra sem geta lesið þetta: til hvers eruð þið að eiða tímanum í svona dellu. Slökvið á tölvunni, farið út og hlaupið nokra hringi í kringum húsið ykkar. Og þegar þið komið aftur inn skulið þið lesa góða bók!!! TAKK FYRIR. (Á meðan ég man: Þú átt tvær kýr, þær segja mu)

IM: OMG u hav, lk, 2 cowz!!1!

Incoherant Grunts: Unngh! UUUUNGH! Uuhnghhng!

Indonesian: Kamu punya dua sapi. Kamu curi satu sapi portugis. Sapi yang portugis lari sama tetangganya kamu.

Indonesian, Bahasa Gaul: Eloe punya sapi dua. Sapi loe keren abiz bo'.

Irish: Tá dhá bhó agat. Deir siad múúúúú.

Irony: You had two cows, until they trampled each other.

Italian: Avete due mucche.

Japanese: 牛二頭ゲットだぜ！ムー！ (Two cows GET! Mū!)

Javanese: Kowe duwe sapi loro. Siji nggo aku wae ya?

Javanese, Krama: Sampeyan ngagem sapi kalih. Setunggal kangge kula mawon nggih?

Javanese, Walikan: Nyothe muthe bahi ngoyo. Bici lto panyu thae ra?

Jive: Youse have two cows.

Jive 2: Aw, hell yeah! Daaamn, this jive-ass sucker done got hisself two of da finest cows this brutha ever saw! Y'knaw what I'm sayin'? Shonuff ya do!

Kannada: Nimma hatthira erada akalu ide

Kazakh: You are have two cow, worth half price of low-quality wife! Is nice, you like?
Kazakh 2: You don't have two cows. You have two horses.

Kitty: Meow Meow Meow Meow

Klingon: cha' tangqa' Daghaj

Konkani: Tuka don pade assa

Kontinlanguage (Fenno-Anglic pig latin): Kouyontti kovehantti kootwontti kowscontti. Koeythontti kon'tdontti konderstanduntti kontinkonttikonguagelantti.

Korean: kekeke u hav two cowrushes.

Korean (South): 당신은 소 두 마리가 있네.

Korean (North): 동무는 소 두 머리를 갖고 있소.

Kurdish: Du mângana te heye.

Krio: You two cows deh.

Latin (Cicero): Habes in nomine Senati Populique Quiritii Romanorum duas vaccas.

Latin (Virgil): Velut mundum torques sedulus, Iuppiter pater,; Duas vaccas omnibus possedisti mirandas.

Lithuanian: Dvi karvutės, dvi karvutės žalią žolę ėdė...

Lithuanian*2: You have 2 cows, there currently being massacred by Teutonic knights because the farmer dosnt worship Jesus

Latin: Vaccas duas habes.

Latvian: Tev ir divas govis. Tā melnā ir okupante.

Lolcat: I can has two cows?

Lorem Ipsum: Lorem ipsum cows dolor sit amet.

Mafia: We're gonna make your two cows an offer thay cannot refuse, capisce?

Malay: Anda mempunyai dua lembu.

Maltese: Għandek żewg baqriet. (The European Union tries to translate this!)

Mancunian: E'ar! 'E's got two fuckin' cows! Blindin'!

Manglish: Where can two cows like that. Aiyah, oklah.

Maori: Yous fellas got two cows bro, huhuhuhu!

Massachusetts: You got ta cows. Wonda why. 'Scuse me, I'm goin' ta da bubbla. Afta dat, I'll go pawk ma caw in da yawd.

Marathi: Tumchyakade don gaai aahet.

Mayan: 'a nu cha' ch'ab'

Metropolitan: I'VE GOT YOUR F*CKING COWS RIGHT HERE!

Middle English: Thou hast twain kine. Mou.

Mimomo: Mimo ma moomoo momo.

Minnesotan: Uff-da! You got two cows dere, you betcha.

Modern Welsh: Is there any Marijuana on you?

Moldavian: Nu, iaca tu tipa ai douâ vaşi...

Morse: -.-- --- ..- / .... .- ...- . / - .-- --- / -.-. --- .-- ... / -... ..- - / -.-- --- ..- / -.-. .- -. .----.; - / .-. . .- -.. / - .... . -- / -... . -.-. .- ..- ... . / - .... . -.-- / .- .-. . / .. -. / -- --- .-. ... .

MooSpeak: Moo mooo moo cows.

Mr. Saturn: HAvE TwO COws, BOinG! DAKOTA!

Nadsat: You have two korovas, some veck crasts them off you. You gavoreet to some of your droogs, itty 'round his place, and filly and dratsy with him to set him right.

Nadsat 2: You have two korovas. You drink some moloko plus.

Norwegian: Du har to kuer.

Norwegian, north: Du din førbanna hæstkuk har to kua.

Oklahoman: You have two cows. Why can't we be in Texas, instead?

Old Welsh: Mae gennych chi ddwy fuwch.

Old English: Þu habban twegen cu.

OOOOOOOOO: :ooo dude you have two cows!!!.

Ostrobothnian: Sullon kaks itikkaa, mut mullonki enemmä!

Otaku: Wai-wai! You has two cows. That is so kawaii!

Paris Hilton: you have two cows... That's Hot! Wanna have a four way with the cows?

Pig Latin: Habe tuous couus quid latinus ueryus goodus speacent.

Pig Latin the second: ouryay othermay adhay wotay owscay

Polish: Masz dwie krowy, ale przed 1989 miałeś tylko kartki na krowy i musiałeś czekać 10 lat aż dostaniesz krowy.

Polish Poznań dialect: źęń 2 żółść, kurwa tej!

Political Candidate: If I am elected, I promise to provide everyone with two cows.

Portuguese: You've got two cows, que porra!

European Portuguese: Tu tens duas vacas, e fazes uma bicha para vendê-las a uns putos.

Brazilian Portuguese: Você tem duas vacas, não vai tomar leite do boi, porra!!!

Proto-Gibberish: ??¿?COW

Proto-Indo-European: duwo-s gwou-o káp-si

Québecois: V'z'avé deux vaches, d'calisse en m'dit tartôfoffies!

Québecois: Bin oui, t'as deux vaches. Kessé k'tu veux bin k'ça m'crisse?

Québecois: Tes deux vaches sont plus petites que les miennes. J'te jure.

Redneck English: Yo' haf two cows.

Redneck English (2): Yup, ya got yerself coupla cows thar...yup..mmmmm hmmm.

Romanian: Ai două vaci.. pe care ti le-a luat apa. (You have two cows.. and the flood took them away)

ROT13: Lbh unir gjb pbjf, ohg gurl tbg gnxra njnl sbe artyrpg nsgre lbh fcraq ubhef ba gur vagrearg gnyxvat va EBG13!

Putin: There is no such thing as 2 cows.

Russian: А ты уже поимел двух коров?

Russian 2: Чoц hдvе тwo cфшs.

Russian Reversal: In Soviet Russia, two cows have YOU!!

Russian Russian Reversal: В Советской России, у двух коров есть ТЫ!

Russian Russian Reversal Reversal: В Капиталистической Америке, две коровы вас похоронят!

Sanskrit: You have dvigu.

Sarcasm: No, you don't have two cows.

Scooby-Doo-ish: Roo rav roo rows.

Scottish Gaelic: Tha dà bò agad.

Scottish English: Ye cannae huv two coos.

Senator: An act mandating that everyone have two cows and declaring an emergency.

Serbian: Имаш две краве.

Simlish: Uwah shnanamo.

Simon Ray: Ur a Nigel, duckhead!

Simple: Cows. Two.

Singlish: Wah lau eh, you got two cows sia.

Slovak: Máš dve kravy.

Snoop Dogg: Fo Shizzle Two Cavizzle Mah Nizzle

Spanish: Tienes dos vacas. D VRAS?

Argentinian Spanish: Che, chabón, tenés dos vacas boludo.

Chilean Slang: Este hueón tiene dos vacas.

Mexican Slang: Presta las vacas carnal.

Spanglish: You have dos cows, pendejo.

Spoonerism: Mardon me padam, I believe you have coo Taos.

Sumerian: (shu ishu shina ab ana)

Swedish: Du har två kor.

Swedish (2): du ba har två kor å dom ba börja knulla typ *skrattar*

Swahili: Chinja haraka tule nyama choma na Tusker!

Tamil: Ungalidam irandu Pasukkal ullana. Pasu paal kodukkum. உங்களிடம் இரண்டு பசுக்கள் உள்ளன . பசு பால் கொடுக்கும் .

Tamil (Madras): Unnaanda redndu maadu keethuba! maadu paal kudukkum, atha kuduchuttu ootaanda nalla kalaaikalaam! உன்னாண்ட ரண்டு மாடு கீதுப்பா ! மாடு பால் குடுக்கும் , அத்த குட்சுட்டு ஊட்டாண்ட னல்லா கலாய்க்கலாம்

Tamil (Maniratnam): நீ , ரெண்டு , மாடு !! Nee , Rendu , Maadu

Tlön-Uqbar: It youly cowed twice.

Tomswifty: "Your two cows give excellent milk," Tom uddered.

Turkish: İki ineğiniz var...

Turkish (2): ÖKÜÜÜÜÜZZZZZ!!!!!!

Turkish (3): O diil de sizin iki ineğiniz vardı nooldo onlara?

Turkish (4): Bayramda altı aile iki ineğe girdik.

Typo: Yuo have tow wosc

Typo: You have two vows.

Uncertain: You have two cows. At least, I think you do. Are those cows? Or cardboard ones, maybe? Um... Maybe 1 cow and 1 over-sized white pig with black spots?

Valley Girl: You like, totally have two cows, man! OMG!

weirdo: jkcnnvfnvnsnzinvdnnfhnjkxdn\bdvfjdnvjdnvjbnbnfnznjidgnnf

West Midlands English: "What am those?" "They'm two cows."

Whale: Youuuuuu Haaaaaave twwwwwwwwoooooooo Cooooowws

Flemish: Je hebt twee koeien. Een wil vlaamse onafhankelijkheid, de ander vindt haar een lompe koei. Je eet de eerste koe op.

Yiddish: Two cows? That schlemiel? Oy, a shaynim broches. I should have such mazel!

Yoda: Two cows you have. Cows lead to milk. Milk leads to Dairy Products. Dairy Products lead to deaths of lactose intolerant individuals.

Yu-Gi-Oh Abridged: You have two cows playing a childrens' card game. Nyeh!

Nazi: Vee haf 2 cow to make you talk. Vee vill kill ze two cows if you don't talk.

Kannada Local: Sisya nin thava eldu hasugalu aithe.
Gamer: All your cow are belong to us
Goku: What's a cow? Does it fight fair?
l33tGamer: u hv 2 c0wz and I'll pwn you NEwayz.
l33tGamer 2: ha ha the n00b pwned 2 l33t cws
n00b: Where can I download 2 cows?
R2D2: blip blip bloop
Oscar Wilde: The two cows are gay.
Dawn of War Player: There is only one mission. Kill Two cows
Diablo 2 Player: meh I'll put wert's leg and a tome of townportal into a horadric cube and get pwned by two cows.
Space Marine: Burn the Heretic, Kill the mutant, Milk thy two cows.

Uncyclopedia presents: the You have two cows anthology!
	1. Analysis 2. Anime 3. Bovine Quotes 4. Cowmedy 5. Emootions 6. Endings 7. Famous Cows	8. Groups 9. This cow does not exist 10. In the Moos 11. Language of Cows 12. Literature 13. Moosical Moovements 14. Moovies	15. Non-Video Games 16. People 17. Politicowl Junk 18. Programming Languages 19. Religion 20. Software 'n Such 21. Sound of Moo-sic	22. Television 23. Travel 24. Video Games 25. World and Web of Cows 26. You Have n Cows 27. Science 28. Moodicine
`“Only together can we turn the cows to the Dark Side of the Fence.”` `~ Emperor Palpatine on You have two cows`