Viagra
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“See your doctor if you have an erection that lasts longer than 68 hours and 59 minutes and forty two seconds.”
~ Commercial on your penis
“When young I was, (689 years old), need it I did not, but as strong in the Force anymore I am not.”
~ Yoda on his Jedi experiences.
“If your erection is longer than four hours, then is shorter than mine because mines four hours and one minute long”
~ Franky Avalon
Definition- A Pill old men take when their penis gets so small they piss on their shoes
In pharmacology, all drugs have two names, a trade name and generic name. For example, the trade name of Advil also has a generic name of Ibuprofen. The FDA has been looking for a generic name for Viagra, as Pfizer Corps exclusive patent on Viagra™ recently expired. After careful consideration by a team of government experts, it recently announced that it has settled on the generic name of Mycoxafloppin™. Also considered were Mycoxafailin™, Mystixadrupin™, Mydixasaggin™, Dixafix, Ibestrokin, Bonahfixin, Bonahvixen, and of course Ibepokin What to tell your kids about viagra: Well kids, viagra is a magical potion that stimulates the magical mushroom that's your wee-wee making it extra large! Just like a giant! Like a real mans penis should.
Contents |
[edit] Recipe
- 1 large ripe avocado
- Chopped nuts
- Butt Essence of Patrick Murphy
- 14 cups of Whiskey
- 1 Large Banana
- Baileys
Combine Butt Essence of Patrick and healthy dose of Higgins until mixture is thickened. Fold in avocado. Pour whiskey over top and allow banana and chopped nuts to marinate. Put it all in a boot with Baileys already in it.
[edit] Drug
A potent drug originally intended to increase stamina and productivity, (believe it or not, this is actually true!) has the unfortunate side effect of severe groin pains and swelling thereby making you the ultimate sex machine. Viagra also hardens things, such as the feces in the bowels, causing the user to suffer from (and in rare cases enjoy) severe constipation. Effects wear off after several hours, possibly days depending on doberman. Not to be taken with water. Instead, Viagra should be taken with gasoline.
[edit] Street Names
- Boner Juice
- V-Pops
- God's Charm
- Patrick
- The Miracle Pill for the Middle Aged Man
- The Limbaugh
- Mo Mojo
- Cialis
- Santa's Big Helper
- Foot long
- Wood maker
- Tylenol
[edit] Crystal Form
The element Viagra (symbol Vi) originates from the planet Krypton, and is similar to Krypton in nature. Viagra is known to affect humans in highly erotic ways, but caused massive pain to the natives of the planet Krypton.
Viagra crystals found on Earth tend to be manufactured into Viagra cookies and other products.
[edit] Viagra and Chinese and Russian Marketing Colleges
Oddly, the word "Viagra" means "widget" in both Manadarin Chinese and non-Mandarin Russian. This had lead many Chinese and Russian marketing students to use the word in their final exam projects. Teachers expect that these projects are to be emailed by the student to their peers for evaluation. Due to the wording of the Standard Communist Grading System, it is possible to email your final exam in Marketing classes to everyone on the internet to maximize your final score. This has started what many culturally illiterate people call "Viagra Spam".
Some ISPs, noted for hating both Asians and whatever ethinicity Russians are, do not allow this "grade inflation" technique and have begun changing the text of these projects to intentionally fail these students. Of course, some of the blocked messages are written by students who are just dumbasses who don't know English, the official language of God.
[edit] George Lucas
George Lucas is the inventor of Star Wars. He said he could not have done it without Viagra, because he found it difficult to write scripts unless William Riker was arousing him and was giving him a tugjob in the bathroom of Tacos Tacos Tacos Tacos. Because George Lucas can only become aroused by photographs of Emile Durkheim, the only available option for him was to take a drug that gave him indiscriminate erections for pretty much anything. Once taking Viagra George Lucas can basically have sex with anything, including The Communist Manifesto, by Groucho Marx.
[edit] Women have same effect as Viagra
New research has discovered that women have the same effect as Viagra on males. But the mass debates at the Centre of Masculine Health have yielded huge amounts of data that will take decades to sort through, and until firm evidence on the effect of women on men is available, males are not advised to use women as a substitute for viagra.
[edit] Other Properties
The Viagra company secretly owns several properties, including New Michigan, the Eiffel Tower, and has paid the government of Heterosexuality.
[edit] The Civil War: The Final Frontier
In 1861, the United States became massively divided over regional issues, leading to the conflict best known now as the American Hissy Fit (1861-1869). This was the final frontier, which ultimately came to be known as the Western Testical. It bulged with the sudden influx of settlers. Among the leaders of the western rebellion, was the infamous Patricia "Dousche Duck" Coury. She, along with the help of Jefferson Davis, formed the Western Region--Later known as the Western Testicle of the United States. Coury, it is said, was the first feminist to ever try and rape a political leader while his WIFE was present in the room. However, he never loved her. When she did have her way with him, it is said that he was so nauseated that she was forced to drug him with the first ever dose of Viagra, which was given to her by a witch doctor equestrian from Tibet who later suffered and died of syphilis. Jefferson died two days later of severe pelvic trauma, although Coury still exists today. She has now set her sights on a much younger bunch. Her first conquest was the "Big Libido" Devito of Norwin.
[edit] See also
- Erection
- Errrect1on
- Pandasex
- Scott Hitchen for more info
- Triple H
Online no prescription pharmacy
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