User talk:Mordillo/archive10

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Stop that! You're being silly!

Please leave new messages at the bottom And when I say please I do ask for it nicely. No, seriously. If you'd like an article restored, please live a link with your complaint and a restoration fee of 12 Euros. No Dollars please. Nobody takes Dollars anymore. If you'd like to use profanities, please be original. If you'd like some more dildos, please hold the line, our representatives shall be with you shortly. If that's you calling, Yettie, I have your teddy bear in store for whenever you want to come and visit

THE GREAT TALK PAGE RAVAGING PARTY

It's me

I raepd your talk page. It was Cajek.   CAKE J! <15:33, 27 May 2008>

DAMN RAPIST! you probably beat the rest of them by two seconds or so! ~ 15:34, 27 May 2008 (UTC)

You cannot deny my mad raping skillz.   CAKE J! <15:34, 27 May 2008>

You are teh rapxxors! ~ 15:35, 27 May 2008 (UTC)

Damn it! I so wanted to rape this page...It would have been kinda cool, like raping your dad but different, ya know? Sir FSt. Don Pleb Yettie (talk) QotF BFF NotM RotM UNPotM UGotM CUN PEE SR UnProvise 15:38 27 May

Hey, it's my teddy bear! Sir FSt. Don Pleb Yettie (talk) QotF BFF NotM RotM UNPotM UGotM CUN PEE SR UnProvise 15:38 27 May

Wait I had that be- I just realized I am Mordillo's Uncyc Great grandchild :/ hows that for making you feel old :D --Sir DJ ~ Irreverent 15:48, 27 May 2008 (UTC)

EEEP! Does that make me your Uncyc Auntie? /me feels old... -- Luverly - (Contribs) (Talk) Grammar Nazi, Mum , BFF & NotM, CUN , GMP . - Perkele! 06:03, 29 May

Yeh and I'm Cajek's uncle...he he. Neh neh, Cajek! Sir FSt. Don Pleb Yettie (talk) QotF BFF NotM RotM UNPotM UGotM CUN PEE SR UnProvise 15:50 27 May

NO! NO IT CANNOT BE! NO! NO! HUH-UH! (good lord, Mordillo, you're OLD)   CAKE J! <21:53, 27 May 2008>

I don't think he can hear you, he hasn't got his hearing trumpet out. Speak a little louder, dearie. - [21:55 27 May] Sir FSt. Don Pleb Yettie (talk) QotF BFF NotM RotM UNPotM UGotM CUN PEE SR UnProvise

*Looks around* Oooh... It's so spacy... *throws a wild party at Sabba's place while he looks elsewhere* On second thought... *leaves a hooker on Grandpa's bed, so he'll have something to comfort him when he sees the place has been trashed...* -- Luverly - (Contribs) (Talk) Grammar Nazi, Mum , BFF & NotM, CUN , GMP . - Perkele! 15:44, 27 May

Thanks...

...I came round at picked up Mike the teddy bear earlier, you were out so I just let myself in, I hope that's okay? I've put it in a a neat little cardboard box for the moment and cut some wholes in it so Mike doesn't suffocate. Thanks for putting him on the shelf there. - [20:03 27 May] Sir FSt. Don Pleb Yettie (talk) QotF BFF NotM RotM UNPotM UGotM CUN PEE SR UnProvise

/me looks at all the mess I cannot believe you had such a huge party when I was away! It's going to take me hours to clean that up! AND SOMEONE WAKE UP THE DRUNK HOOKER! LUVVY!!!!!! ~ 12:09, 28 May 2008 (UTC)

Hey, what did you call me? - [12:44 28 May] Sir FSt. Don Pleb Yettie (talk) QotF BFF NotM RotM UNPotM UGotM CUN PEE SR UnProvise

/me silently points towards the drunk hooker on the bed, courtesy of Luvvy ~ 12:48, 28 May 2008 (UTC)

Hey, you'll never believe what I found, dad! It's a drunk hooker, can we keep it, please? Please can we, dad? - [12:56 28 May] Sir FSt. Don Pleb Yettie (talk) QotF BFF NotM RotM UNPotM UGotM CUN PEE SR UnProvise

"Dad"? So does that make you my uncle, YTTE? -- Luverly - (Contribs) (Talk) Grammar Nazi, Mum , BFF & NotM, CUN , GMP . - Perkele! 06:03, 29 May

I'm not sure, does it? - [08:39 29 May] Sir FSt. Don Pleb Yettie (talk) QotF BFF NotM RotM UNPotM UGotM CUN PEE SR UnProvise

Uncle! -- Luverly - (Contribs) (Talk) Grammar Nazi, Mum , BFF & NotM, CUN , GMP . - Perkele! 17:25, 29 May

If he's your uncle, than what would that make Cajek?! ~ 07:08, 30 May 2008 (UTC)

I'm Cajek's uncle too! So that makes you two cousins, doesn't it? - [10:44 30 May] Sir FSt. Don Pleb Yettie (talk) QotF BFF NotM RotM UNPotM UGotM CUN PEE SR UnProvise

However a frightening detail. I've got a nagging memory telling me that Daddy's mentioned Cajek is his dad. Wouldn't that be... Illegal? *swallows nervously...* -- Luverly - (Contribs) (Talk) Grammar Nazi, Mum , BFF & NotM, CUN , GMP . - Perkele! 01:24, 2 Jun

Actually, Cajek, being Leddy's son, is my grandson. ~ 07:19, 2 June 2008 (UTC)

Well, you'll have to ask Luvvy about that, it's her hooker. ~ 13:00, 28 May 2008 (UTC)

/me shouts to Luvvy You still there, Luvvy? Can we keeo your drunk hooker, she's very nice and all. - [13:05 28 May] Sir FSt. Don Pleb Yettie (talk) QotF BFF NotM RotM UNPotM UGotM CUN PEE SR UnProvise

You may keep the hooker, if you first get her to wake up. She might look good dressed up as a French Maid and helping Sabba clean up the mess... ^.^ -- Luverly - (Contribs) (Talk) Grammar Nazi, Mum , BFF & NotM, CUN , GMP . - Perkele! 06:03, 29 May

You know me so well Luvvy :O) Btw, I'm planning a weekend in Helsinki, any recommendations you may have regarding the local hookers and beer....~ 07:36, 29 May 2008 (UTC)

/me coughs... Sabba. I am officially not in Finland... Why does this always happen to me? You should ask my baby sister, she's the party gal. I'm always good and nice and cuddly... Right? -- Luverly - (Contribs) (Talk) Grammar Nazi, Mum , BFF & NotM, CUN , GMP . - Perkele! 17:25, 29 May

  CAKE J! <7:25, 02 Jun 2008>

/me applauds Cajek. Now we should actually try make something out of it and expand to a whole new user group... ;) -- Luverly - (Contribs) (Talk) Grammar Nazi, Mum , BFF & NotM, CUN , GMP . - Perkele! 10:59, 2 Jun

So I'm DJ's great granfather? ~ 07:31, 2 June 2008 (UTC)

There's four generations of uncyc in this room! Does that mean we're poor, grampa Mordillo?   CAKE J! <7:37, 02 Jun 2008>

Hell, I'm Jewish, I'm bound to be rich then. ~ 07:38, 2 June 2008 (UTC)

Why do you keep having so many generations of offspring? is it because you like us mooching off of you? I like to think of you as the patriarch of this grand uncyc society.   CAKE J! <7:42, 02 Jun 2008>

Don't tell the Fuhrer I've got Jewish ancestry, he doesn't take to kindly... do tell him I wear stockings on occasion - he likes that... also If I wins WotM it will be 4 generations of WotM :/ --Sir DJ ~ Irreverent 07:44, 2 June 2008 (UTC)

yeah, but they didn't win in order: it's all fucked up! Also, this AAN ancestory is pretty detailed if I do say so myself... I didn't realize LJ is my uncle...   CAKE J! <7:50, 02 Jun 2008>

I was going to do this image thing, Cajek, but you beat me too it! And why did you leave my three children off? Are you cutting them out of the family (and more importantly the assorted wills) or something?! - [15:22 2 June] Sir FSt. Don Pleb Yettie (talk) QotF BFF NotM RotM UNPotM UGotM CUN PEE SR UnProvise

I never got adopted. I is Uncyc orphan. I does not wants adpooption - I is diong fine withouth it. Not beoing adopthed is for teh hardcorezors. Although it may explain why I has no frends. --SirU.U.Esq. VFH | KUN | Natter | Lt? | Pee 15:31, Jun 2

You really want adoption and friends, huh? I'll adopt you! - [15:34 2 June] Sir FSt. Don Pleb Yettie (talk) QotF BFF NotM RotM UNPotM UGotM CUN PEE SR UnProvise

I does not want adopyshun - cant you reed? --SirU.U.Esq. VFH | KUN | Natter | Lt? | Pee 15:37, Jun 2

No, I can't read. Also, if the adoption thing's cool with you, I'll just go and make it official with all the userboxes and stuff. Then we can start your education, which may take a while considering your extreme-n00biness. - [15:40 2 June] Sir FSt. Don Pleb Yettie (talk) QotF BFF NotM RotM UNPotM UGotM CUN PEE SR UnProvise

Erg, arg, your trying to shakle me to a sistem man - I aint gonna be part of no sistem! I play by my oan rulez! --SirU.U.Esq. VFH | KUN | Natter | Lt? | Pee 15:44, Jun 2

Sorry

about that IP's talk page. I was pissed off because he left an insulting message on my talk page, even though I've never even seen this guy before. * Flumpa 21:21, 27 May 2008 (UTC)

That's OK, just ignore it next time. They're not human beings anyhow :) ~ 12:09, 28 May 2008 (UTC)

Woah

Looking for rather too long at that pic of that nice Mr Cleese, I realised something: that particular bit was filmed in Norwich. I live there and stuff! See that "Bell Hotel" behind him? That's one of the pubs I frequent. Christ knows why - it sucks. It's a small world, or something. I am therefore going to have to use that as one of the random images on my userpage. I just thought I'd mention it in passing. Anyway, there's nothing more to see here. --SirU.U.Esq. VFH | KUN | Natter | Lt? | Pee 12:50, May 28

Move along there. Oh, I was meaning to ask you if you're looking for additional work, what with your Smithing duties. ~ 12:52, 28 May 2008 (UTC)

What kind of additional work would this entail, good sir? --SirU.U.Esq. VFH | KUN | Natter | Lt? | Pee 13:01, May 28

Taking care of the HowTo main page. Sort of like updating the main page. I use to do that for a long while, but I don't get around to do it anymore, and it's a damn shame. ~ 13:30, 28 May 2008 (UTC)

*me jumps and down in the air* This sounds exciting... Since the HowTo main page doesn't appear to be protected I guess I could help out right...if UU can't, that is... *reconsiders* actually maybe not, that looks like a might lot of work. - [13:32 28 May] Sir FSt. Don Pleb Yettie (talk) QotF BFF NotM RotM UNPotM UGotM CUN PEE SR UnProvise

Well, you can both go at it? It's basically - updating the featured one every few days, updating the tip of the day template and cropping out the list of new HowTos. ~ 13:34, 28 May 2008 (UTC)

Okey dokey...I'm sure that HowTo:Be French has been there for ages. - [13:36 28 May] Sir FSt. Don Pleb Yettie (talk) QotF BFF NotM RotM UNPotM UGotM CUN PEE SR UnProvise

Yes, but let's wait to see UU's response? ~ 13:37, 28 May 2008 (UTC)

Response coming as soon as you STOP EDIT CONFLICTING ME! Yeah, sure, doesn't look like a problem. I'll get right on it. YTTE, if you want to help, you're welcome. As you're a good one for the formatting and making stuff look interesting, how about I do the mundane maintenance, and you see if you can't make it look a bit more enticing? --SirU.U.Esq. VFH | KUN | Natter | Lt? | Pee 13:38, May 28

Ag! Edit conflict! I was going to say something really funny, but, meh...OK, I'll give it a little style-makeover, but I'll let you do the "mundane" stuff first so we don't edit conflict each other...unless it's all templated...which it is to an extent. I'll come back in a while to do the makeover (it may not be too excting a makeover, but "meh")... - [13:41 28 May] Sir FSt. Don Pleb Yettie (talk) QotF BFF NotM RotM UNPotM UGotM CUN PEE SR UnProvise

195.241.132.182

ha, Mordillo... you rock!   CAKE J! <16:00, 28 May 2008>

Yeah, sorry for getting you blocked for a month, I did ask Greyman to remove it...~ 16:54, 28 May 2008 (UTC)

UnSignpost: May 29nd, 2008

The Uncyclopedia UnSignpost

The Newspaper the Whole Family Must Enjoy!

May 29th, 2008 • Issue 5

Uncyclopedia Second Most Active Wikia Site According to local Wikia staffmember Sannse, Uncyclopedia is the second most active site, next to Halopedia. "Yep. People are more interested in Halos than Uncys. I've never really bothered to look at either site, so I'm not sure why one is more active than another, but I'm sure it's because Halopedia is superior." Reporters on-site have looked into the rumors. Apparently, Halopedia is in fact not about halos, but instead is an entire wiki... devoted to a video game. "Oh lord, this is embarrassing," said Master Chief, the main character of said video games. "I thought I could keep this under wraps for a while longer, but you people in the press are like fucking vultures. WHY DON'T YOU LEAVE ME ALONE?!" Apparently Halopedia's nearest competitor, Uncyclopedia, is some kind of "humor wiki" meant to induce laughter. "Uncyclopedia's laughter is nothing compared with ours," said Evilpedia's founder, User:Dr. Doom, "Our laughter will ring all throughout Wikia, and then: THE WORLD!". Other statistics include the nerdiest wiki and Furwiki, the most disturbing wiki. Uncyclopedia is neither the largest wiki (Wookiepedia), nor the most active (Halopedia), but it does come very close to first in both categories. Who wants to be first place anyway? Nobody wants to win all the time! Like Unsignpost's father used to say: "You learn more from losing than winning!" and really, that's all that matters! ...AAAAHHHHHH!!!!! BASTAAAARRRDDSSS!!! Following Fourth Issue, UnSignpost Does Lame Clip Show After having not seen his boss for a few days, Cajek, or as his friends call him, "Cuntjek", and his team of writers have been forced to rely on past issues and a clip show in article form. "Don't look at us that way!" said that one guy we were talking about. "A few days ago, when Skull was around, I was only editor of the fetish section, now I'm in charge of the whole thing. Jeez, I hope Skull is okay..." The lame clip show was said to be almost entirely from the first issue, when the Unsignpost was "cool", and before the fetish section took over the whole paper. According to reports to this newsroom, the clip show article included the "weekbox of the week" from issue 1 that instructed Cajek and Skull to slather humor juice on an anonymous reader, and the "Goatse Challenging Gap" from issue 2. "Oh shit, what else we got?" Carjack screamed across the newsroom. As of this issue, the huge portrait of Dr. Skullthumper has been prayed to for nigh two weeks since his mysterious disappearance. Fnoodle, who usually serves coffee to the writers (albeit very angrily), has gone on a quest to find his former master. So far, no word of Skullthumper's whereabouts have reached the press. Serious: Dr. Skullthumper is a good friend, and I see him as an outgoing, clever guy, and I'm sure he will succeed in whatever he chooses to do while he's gone. -Cajek Letters to the Editor I am writing this letter in confidence believing that if it is the wish of God for you to help me and my family, God almighty will bless and reward you abundantly. My family and I are true Christian's and worship's God truthfully. I got your contact through Internet during my research on some one who could help us. I am a female student from University of Nigeria, Lagos. I am suitable yrs old. I'd like any person who can be caring, loving and home oriented. I will love to have a long-term relationship with you and to know more about you. I would like to build up a solid foundation with you in time coming if you can be able to help me in this transaction. Well, my father died earlier two months ago and left my mother I and my junior brother behind. He was a king, which our town citizens titled him before his death. I was a Princess to him and I and my brother are the only people who can take Care of his wealth now because my mother is not literate enough to know all my father's wealth behind. He left up to USD $27,350,000.00 dollars (TWENTY SEVEN MILLION, THREE HUNDRED AND FIFTY THOUSAND US DOLLAR) with a security company, and I don't know how and what I will do to invest this money somewhere in abroad, so that my father's kindred will not take over what belongs to