User:Elassint

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Member of the Order of Uncyclopedia
This person has successfully registered on Uncyclopedia. They
should be proud of themselves for making such a smart move.

This user's primary source of artwork is MS Paint.

♂	This user is a boy and is made of slugs, snails and puppy dog tails.

This user can see what you don't.

This user is on fire. You can help uncyclopedia by throwing water on their head

This user is American
...and unabashedly proud of it!
(List of American Uncyclopedians)

This user is an anti-Texan
And is a suspect of terrorism
(List of other anti-Texans)

This user supports free operating systems because he/she is basically a cheapskate.

HeadOn, apply directly to the forehead! HeadOn, apply directly to the forehead! HeadOn, apply directly to the forehead! HeadOn, now available at WalMart.

?	Do not underestimate the power of It. Underestimation of the power of It will kill you from the sheer power of It.

usb

This user likes to use userboxes.

Usb!

No, really!

Color

This user likes random colored userboxes.

This user seriously needs to calm down.

This user can also be found elsewhere on the internet.

This user is an administrator on another Wiki.

This user is a grue and while you were reading this, has eaten you. Start over?

This user hates telephones. Could be due to the fact that the U.S. government is monitoring them.

This user enjoys staring at spinning objects, and may be afflicted with Attention Deficit look at the birdie!.

This user is a Mad Scientist.

Just because I think everyone is trying to kill me doesn't mean they aren't. You know what I mean?

This user will give you a seizure.

This user is getting addicted to templates!

For those obsessed with the so-called experts, Elassint also has a userpage on the English Wikipedia.

TA	This user believes that you can never have too many text adventures on Uncyclopedia.

This user is a complete, irredeemable homology. He/she/it is Bat Fuck Insane, and deceives at the ricer.

This user is reading your thoughts!

This user's IQ is 144.

...

This user would be a professional procrastinator, but he or she can't be bothered.

This user is not a number, s/he is a free wo/man!

AAAA!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAA AAAAAAA AAAAAAA!!!

typo-A

Yuo mihgt not eb abel to udnerstand thsi user becuaies they speka Typo wiht an extermeyl htick acecnt.

9/21

This user will never forget the events of 9/21/07. The day Uncyclopedia was huffed by terrorists.

1+	This user has over 1 edit. Duh!

This user is the random overwrought chump that programmed his uterus inside of your gelato so you must anglicise him/her with your sumptuous faceplant.

Certificate of Respiration
is hereby granted to:
Elassint
for his/her ability to breathe.
--Uncyclopedia HowTo

[edit] SHINY THINGS!!

I WON the do NOT CLICK ANY LINKS GAME!

This user cannot follow any orders!!

Thank you for voting for American (species)!
As thanks, I wanted to give you an actual species of Americanus, but, as I discovered, human sex slaves are apparently illegal, so this patriotic iguana will have to do.
Sincerely, Acolyte CUN RA My cat is better than Benson ^talk ^stalk

"Stop! Vandal!"

Nocturnal Vigilance Badge

While the Admins were busy entertainting Monsignor Sandman,
or sawing logs at work, this user did a spot on job of damage control,
all without the use of an Admin Rifle, Gun, or Turbo Slingshot.
We appreciate your efforts, and hereby bestow upon you
the Most Honourable Title of:
Uncyclopedia Night Watchman

Ta muchly!

Under User would like to present you with a chandelier by way of thanks
for voting for his hat-trick highlight article, HowTo:Fuck Off.
It isn't tasteful or stylish, is in no way understated (unless you happen to live in a palace) and so forth, but it has a long chain, sturdy hand holds, and swings well, and will be an invaluable aid to fucking off stylishly in future. Place it carefully!