Stuff
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THIS ARTICLE A SPLODE.
“You want to buy some STUFF?”
~ Mr. Hakman on some STUFF!
“Stuff occupies space”
~ Captain Obvious on STUFF!
“WHAT THE FUCK HAPPEND TO THE STUFF I LEFT HERE!?!?!?!”
~ Oscar Wilde on This article
“Great i'll grab my STUFF!”
~ Link on his stuff
“I'll do what I want!!”
~ George Washington on doing stuff
“Dave's not here, man.”
~ Chong on stuff
“I've seen some things, man. AND SOME STUFF!”
~ stereotypical Vietnam war veteran on This article
Stuff is the absence of space. It encompasses everything that is not made of space and is therefore an incredibly versatile word. However, it is only considered 'overused' if the number of mentions per hour are greater than (ab+k+(pq))^n where a = person's weight, b = their height, k = number of toes in room, p = number of pets, q = age, and n = IQ divided by 19. Stuff is sometimes also known as things and is sometimes mistaken as products from Wal★Mart.
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[edit] History
Stuff was created by a hippie in 1968 right after the creation of Kylie Minogue, but long before the invention of marijuana or zombie cloning. Stuff spread quickly, and by 1971, it had infected most of the nation of Canada. Today, the shipping company DHL has exclusive rights to the word stuff and uses it as justification for world dominiation saying "we own your ass." god also owns your ass so pleed 4 mercy
[edit] What you should and should not do with stuff
- most stuff should not be eaten
- stuff is not meant to be left alone
- stuff that is too cold should be set on fire
- stuff that is not used to make parking meters is useless, unless it is food
- stuff that is not inflatable will not float, and therefore is not polite to throw in peoples pools
- stuff that can float will not sink, so it can not help you if you're drowning
- stuff given to you for your birthday was not made by the muffin man
- stuff given to you by God will always float because it has a smaller intellegent falling factor than water
[edit] Other Stuff
One great thing about stuff is that we can be injected, smoked, snorted or sexually transmited. After a trip on some crazy stuff, it is most prudent to kill as many kittens as you can find and/or convert to your ever loved religion. However, stuff must never be combined with kitten huffing unless you are an experienced diver in which case i dont have to tell you to mind the gap.
[edit] Big Stuff
Much of the Big Stuff of the world can be found in the Big Stuff Room of the University of The North Pole. Lots of big stuff can also be found inside Oprah.
- Sausages.
- Over sized lederhosen.
- Beer, but not that piss most Americans drink.
- Poor VOLKSWAGEN commercials.
- More sausages.
[edit] Dinges
- Belgian stuff.
[edit] Greier
Norwegian stuff. Can include, but is not limited to:
Moo. A prime example of cow stuff
[edit] Staaarrrrrrf
New Zealand stuff. Includes Maoris, Rangitoto, Takapuna, Whakapapa, Rotorua, Tauranga, Whakatane and jandals.
[edit] Types of stuff
[edit] Nounage
Descriptive of something as opposed to nothing. e.g. "If you don't move your stuff from the table I'm going to throw it in the trashcan".
[edit] Verbage
Indication of displeasure e.g. "Stuff off or I'll kick your bollocks in."
[edit] Wordage
Should be used liberally. See Wilde, 1465: "'Tis the stuff of legends that to be stuffed by a Welshman is better stuff than to (etc...)" (Oscar "Wildman" Wilde, 1465)
[edit] Garbage
A post-conceptual, neo-grunge and pre-synthetic rock outfit.
[edit] Boobage
Stuff that bounces.Can be used as flotation device.
[edit] Cabbage
Why is this here? See Keane.
- Getting or being stuffed (up) must be in here too innit?
[edit] Baggage
Stuff yet to be claimed.
[edit] Raggage
When ten capybara get an electric shock.
[edit] Burpage
The act of looking up the word cuckoldry in the dictionary.
[edit] Reggae
Stuffin' it with style. yes, no , maybe, sometines, but never when eating tapioca pudding?
[edit] Answerage
The word 'stuff' can be used as the answer to almost any question, peaking as of 1996 at #3 in the International Q&A Olympics ranking. Common examples include:
- What did'ja study?
- Stuff
- Wherefore art thou?
- Stuff
- Did'ja se dat??
- Erm... I did see some stuff
- What are you doing with my mom??
- Stuff
- Stuff you wouldn't believe... yo.
- So, what would Vin Diesel do in our situation?
- He would kick all manner of ass and stuff, but his acting still sucks.
- Are you stoned?
- Well you know I just stuffed some stuff there.
- Did you vote for Bush?
- No, he wont do any stuff.
- What happens when you mix putty, rat hair, some crack, and a few cell phones?
- Stuff?....no an exciting weekend
- So...what did you think of the concert last night?
- It was...Stufftastic!
[edit] As every word in a sentancage
Stuff the stuffing stuffers!
[edit] Measuring Stuff
For measuring the Stuffness-level of something or some place you need to understand the Russian quadruple reversal. If you understand the RQR you can measure Stuffness-level by inserting RQR to the spot where the Stuff is suspected to reside. If the RQR makes sense after the procedure, sense-making level must be measured and divided by zero. TWICE. This will give you the exact level of Stuffness in the current spot,unless you are in germany and then you have to do it on the flipside.
[edit] Celebrities who use Stuff
Eddie Izzard... And stuff. Really, he's great. He's got stuff. Carrot Top, and stuff. Unfortunately in his arsenal of stuff, he doesn't have a knife to slit his wrist. Seth Green, possibly one of the most famous stuff-users of all time. Your Mom. Dude, you really don't want to KNOW the kind of stuff she uses. Prince. S/he has a large amount of stuff, generally in the form of shitty songs, androgyny, and lawsuits. Britney Spears. Primarily illegally obtained stuff. Michael Jackson has lots of stuff. Little boy's underwear, little boys, extra noses.
[edit] Objects that should probably be stuffed
idk
