Scenester
From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia.
“A vintage scenester made my Anna orgasm so hard, she bit off my mole.”
~ Enrique Iglesias on Scenester
“I'm not scene, I'm a chav, innit. *Peace out*”
~ Ana, scene wannabe on Scenester
[edit] Scenester/Scene Kid
Scenesters are emo kids with brighter colours and less cuts, really. They are way cooler. They do not call themselfs scene because it will seem poserish. All of those fuckers that hate on scene kids need to get a life, fuck a cat or something. They seem to believe that the world owes them something, usually in the form of [1.8k+] on MySpace.
To define a scenester, let's start off with a bit of a shopping list:
-Gorgous extremely superficial,they usually make friends with those who on their "group".
- eyeliner. Usually tapered to a point at the edges of the eyesridiculous.
- Eyeshadow, usually two or more colours blended together.
- Skinny jeans and studded belts.
-iPods with Hello Kitty cases -Finding Nemo or Care Bears back packs, because apparently looking like a childish retard is trendy.
-More fluorescent colours than a satellite map.
-A habit of chalking their MySpace and Livejournal URLs on public streets.
- A penchant for stripes, stars, polka dots, ♥, "&&", semicolons, hoodies, the word "rad", handguns, the sound effects "BANG BANG", "RAWR", "BEEP BEEP" and any combinations of those, the 'word' "kthx", dinosaurs, robots, and anything "retro".
-Talk stuff
-A bunch of people who are beautiful.Which mean if your ugly then "back the fuck off"
-love jeffree star
[edit] Internet Disease
100% of scene kids have a MySpace, and 99.9% have a LiveJournal. They have a bad habit of switching Livejournal names every two weeks, when "______sxe_sex__" gets old. Fortunately those with at least 100 friends on MySpace don't change accounts all too often, because they tend to lose more than 70 per cent of those friends.
A typical MySpace bulletin consists of "new photosssss. pc4pc, fuckupss. xoxo you know i love you, bangbabes. [[[:&♥;", and a LiveJournal post is either pretty much the same thing, or pissy songs ripped off Panic At The Disco's lyrics.
But no matter what the title is, most of the bullshit-ins will always contain bullshit like "repost this 1,000,000,000,000,0000 times in the next 10 minutes or some clown with a knife will rape your mum at midnight".
Most scene kids have AIM or MSN, with stupid screen names like 'trendy miracle', which they certainly aren't. MSN display names are usually something along the lines of ___x. the nightmare before [LiANA] _ &&iloveyoukassierawr<33;;
Usually, most scene kids will attempt to get with every boy/girl that has ever connected to the internet. In modern society, these people are called W-H-O-R-E-S.
[edit] Music/Shows
Scene kids are know to attend 'concerts' which they like to go 'shows'. The bands on the list usually include a bunch of cookie cutter bands that slam on their instruments while the 'singer' molests and pleasures the mic by 'screaming his pain from having a happy family' into it.
Scene kids particulary enjoy 'indie' and 'unknown' bands, because they feel special that the music they listen to isn't 'mainstream'. For, the idea of being a scenester and listening to a band that has success is the equilivent of having to wear pants that fit right.
