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Avert thine eyes!

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“n00b”

~ WTF

Often seen with an exclamation mark, WTF! (pronounced "Tebja Ja Lublu") is an expression of disbelief uttered by people when something really unexpected happens, and less occasionally is an acronym for "Whack The Frog". It is derived from that dark day of history when the World Trade Farmhouses were destroyed by aircraft impacting into them under the ~~guidance~~ influence of The Kentuckistan Fundamentalist Chickens. Or was it George W.T.F. Bush?

Vista can say WTF too!

Many people find it hard to address the feelings from these events as they are quite frankly ~~FUBAR~~ emotionally retarded and cannot accept the loss of several barnyard animals that they didn't even know.

Wtf is also a file extension for ~~Winblows~~ ~~Win-Doze~~ Windows Text File.

[edit] The Kentuckistan Fried Chickens - An Overview

Ogmo raises the WTF flag.

An offshoot of the Al Quieggda fundamentalist terrorist group and the Kentuckistan Militia, the K.F.C. are an extremist group that require that freedom be granted to all animals who identify themselves as followers of the Great Mother Clucker. Al Quieggda has disavowed the K.F.C. as too extreme even for them (see: I.R.A. portrayal in Hollywood films). The leader of the K.F.C. is an ex-military man who goes only by the name Colonel Sanders. He is apparently proficient in planning complex operations and has excellent intelligence gathering capabilities, likely due to his 11 secret spies. Also, a rebel group of cows, based in Nebraska, hopes to control the world by using uranium enriched huffing cats to make humans retarded.

Little hard data is available on the K.F.C. due to the structure of their organisation. Small groups of 4-5 chickens work in shells unsupported by the main group. Only Colonel Sanders had the capability to communicate with all the different shells and this happens only when a major operation is scheduled. Rumours circle the internet that Colonel Sanders may once have had the tacit support of the CIA but conflicting information from multiple sources has so far meant that proving this has been extremely difficult to date.

[edit] Events Leading Up To The WTF! Attacks

Colonel Sanders in a rare photo.

Colonel Sanders had already been sought in connection with several attacks throughout the countryside, information brought to the FBI and CIA indicated he had been behind the attack on the coal and an earlier attack on the World Trade Farmyard which caused minimal damage.

Attempts to kill or assassinate Colonel Sanders were hindered by him being one step ahead of his hunters. No matter where in the world he was sought all that remained at the K.F.C. outlets was Colonel Sanders propaganda. Sanders used his family's wealth from chickens to equip and train a unit of Kamikaze Fundamentalist Chickens to pay back the farmer for his cruelty and teach him a lesson.

The chickens began their attack by infiltrating the farmyard, several warning signs given by the farmers dog were ignored by the new management of the farm and this resulted in them going to ground and beginning their training in Ernest.

Ernest was the first of two crop-duster biplanes (the other was Delilah) used in the early morning attack. Indications that the chickens might be practising flight and takes off with little to no concern for landings were passed to field agents (mostly cows) who issued warnings to the Farmer who dismissed the warnings as "not detailed enough to make policy decisions". The fact that these warnings were communicated multiple times makes this a little hard to accept.

The aircraft took off shortly after 7am and were seen circling the barn at approximately 8am just as the cows were being milked. At 8.33 on that morning the first aircraft impacted the barn. Fourteen minutes later the second aircraft crashed into the second level of the barn and the building began it's collapse.

Wtfrogs, in their natural habitat.

WTF=WHERES THE FOOD?

[edit] Aftermath of the WTF! Attacks

Most of the world watched the second aircraft crashing into the barnyard on the Cable News Networks. Fox News reporters were present (there are rumours that they were attempting to sneak into the barnyard coop in an attempt to catch some candid shots of farmyard favourites Ben Affleck and his latest chick).

Several cows and up to thirty sheep were killed in the attack. One old donkey and nearly one hundred chickens were wounded or suffered shock from their close proximity to the act of terrorism. Quick thinking by the big-handed farm boy helped reduce damage to surrounding buildings. The farmer's wife was killed instantly as the fuel ignited but the farmer survived the initial impact but was seen running around screaming "E E E E E E E E Ee e e e e eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee e" for several minutes until he died from his horrific wounds.

After the smoke cleared the damage was assessed, over $1,337 worth of damage had been done to the farm. Several buildings had to be demolished due to structural damage caused by secondary explosions.

[edit] World Reaction to the Event

People ask God: WTF!?

Around the world support was offered - disaster relief agencies went into over drive and several nations pledged to assist in any way to ensure that the evildoers were punished for their crimes. Colonel Sanders was suspected of being behind the attacks but family members of the farmer indicated that this was an ideal opportunity to go after a completely unrelated farm down the way which had once picked on the farmer.

Captain Manatee of the Moose Jaw Red Cross donated 300 copies of Betty and Veronica comic books to the efforts.

Eyelashes were plucked for free at most Roman Catholic churches in the upper Michigan area. The Surrey Club elected a new chancellor to reflect their new perception of the 21st Century Rainbow upon hearing news of the events.

[edit] Reactions in Foreign and Domestic Policy

[edit] aka Squandering International Goodwill

The farmers extended family soon entered into a blood feud with the farm down the way which caused many deaths and terrific amounts of debt and unhappiness. The family of the deceased farmer justified this action by stating that "...they were bringing freedom to the animals of the farm down the way...", little realising that this was exactly the same reasoning given by Colonel Sanders and his K.F.C. suicide bombers. There are rumours that the farm farther down the street is next.

[edit] You know you're WTF when...

The first 150 entries right here on Uncyclopedia

WTF mascot.

...you know
...It's been a day since you submit something on VFH
1. ...and you're unfamous within the society
...you are redundant redundant redundant redundant redundant
...you Xperience deja vu
...your coffee explodes
...there is acid on your butt
...you Xperience deja vu
...everybody cares
...your fridge is running
1. on ice, get it? Ice?
...the previous line was funny
...you are caring
...OMGBBQ without the WTF
...Uncyclopedia is interesting
...You manage to mash an adult rat against your forehead
...you know JavaScript's ins and outs
...you drive a car made out of wood
...life is out in the clothing business
...this article gets featured
...a lamp cares about your life
...someone finds Fred The Monkey funny
...someone finds ED funny
...Blender is simple
...BENSON EATS YOU
...Chuck Norris is Featured (wait, what?)
...you LITERALLY care
...Hardwick Fundlebuggy is a buggy
...Zombiebaron is an actual baron, bäroning zombies
...hümõr iśńt śhöćkińg ör ińćómpréhéńšiblè liké it üšèd tö bè
...King Kong wants you dead for 90 bucks
...Clams wants you dead for 90 bucks
...you are an Uncyc Sysop.
...Boobs are arrested for jaywalking
...That sheep you bought the other day turns a mysterious shade of lilac
...you know how long Englebert Humpherdinck's dick is
...you're parents gave you your last name as your first name too(ex.Antonio Gabriel Antonio)
...you actually like the idea of having your last name as you're first name
...you Went To France
...it's the international holiday of frog-whacking.
...you realize you didn't actually come out of your mom's vagina but instead you came out of her ass
...it's weasel stomping day (has mentionned on Robot Chicken).
...you know someone named Richard(or Dick) Bagner.
...you've read the whole list and it hits you that it's actually real people who have wasted their time on this crap
...you LMAO
...you catsup
...you get Rick Roll
...a bomb is gonna explode on you.
...your cat eats soup
...your rescue akitten from at three
...You moom.
...Kuotaitatrea is your new name
...You begin to realise your still reading this list
...Wow, you actually read this one too....WTF